I Believe We Can Heal Our Partisan Divide If You Just Admit Gravity Is Real

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“Well, it’s four years later, and here we are, still dug into our stubborn ideological trenches. Me, with a passionate belief in a pervasive force that exerts its pull on all objects, creating relative balance within our solar system and drawing us toward the center of the planet. And you, with your equally firm conviction that the sensation of weight I mention is the result of invisible anti-freedom ropes woven by gay Democratic warlocks and lashed to your limbs so your arms feel heavy when you reach for your guns or try to pray.”

“I believe we can find common ground again if you’ll just acknowledge the possibility that gravity is an actual scientific phenomenon and not a magical deep-state plot.”

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